Wednesday, September 02, 2009

Do You Get Your Feelings Hurt Easily?

Sometimes I have too much time on my hands and I begin to wax philosophical. And I was just sitting here thinking about people who tend to get their feelings hurt.

No one has hurt my feelings lately--not in a long time. In fact, I often say, you can't hurt my feelings. I don't think that is entirely true, but they don't get hurt easily.

I guess that means I not overly sensitive, so I don't take offense or look for reasons to be offended. I think that's a good thing. However, that becomes a two edged sword. If I'm not easily offended or hurt, then I'm not always sensitive to what I might do that would offend or hurt someone else.

Case in point. Many years ago, a friend of mine had remodeled a house and moved in. When I saw the house for the first time, I went on and on about what a beautiful job she had done with everything. I talked about what good ideas she had for doing the things she had done, and was quite vocal about how pretty everything was. I found out several years later that I had offended her. Her comment to another person was that I obviously thought she had no taste and therefore was quite surprised that everything looked so good.

That wasn't what I meant at all, but that was what she perceived. It's very important that we be careful about the things we say and do, especially what we say. I wouldn't hurt anyone's feelings on purpose, but as usual my mouth does it for me.

"He who will love life, and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile." 1 Peter 3:10

It's that guile part that gets me every time.

Have you ever hurt another's feelings without any intention of doing so? I'm thinking a lot of times, we don't know when we've hurt others, so we have to be really careful about what we say and how we say it.

I hope you've had a great Wedensday. Pray for our country. Love one another.


Twisted Fencepost said...

I am very much like you.
And sometimes things I say in a positive note seem to be taken negative. I try to compliment as much as possible and it hurts me to think someone might have taken it in a negative way.
Over the last several years I have begun keeping my mouth shut for fear of saying something wrong.
Now I'm being taken as not too friendly. It seems I can't win. So I spend a lot of time by myself. I don't have to worry about hurting others if I'm not around them.

Marge said...

I get my feelings hurt very easily. I wish that wasn't the case, but it is. I try to be more thick skinned, but it doesn't work very well. I'm working on just letting things roll off my shoulders, but I'm certainly not there yet!

And there are a couple of people that I hold in my thoughts in front of, as they both seem to take everything I say in the wrong way. So, I just keep my mouth shut! I don't like to hurt people.

We had a nice day here. I hope your day was lovely also.

Hugs and blessings.

Amy said...

I seem to freeze under pressure when I need to speak - so I say the worst things - without intending to?

When I write, I have more time to process what I need to say and what is the most effectife way to say it, but when I'm speaking - well? It's anybody's guess what is going to fly out and how someone is going to perceive it. I work very hard on this, but sometimes I just slip!

Debra said...

I'm very "plain spoken", so I have had to learn to be extra careful.

A work in progress, no doubt, that's me *sigh*.

Have a great weekend!

Brenda S Okie in Colorado said...

I think you are blaming yourself for something your friend has turned around. I would have done the same thing you did in telling her what a great job she did. Her mindset at that moment was to take offence in whatever you said. I have a brother that does the same thing. Love him, but hard to communicate with.
Blessings to you.

Tipper said...

Yes I have hurt others feelings without meaning too-and others have hurt my feelings when I'm sure they didn't intend too. I think it's just life.

Lisa said...

I know that I say things that offend people. I don't every do it on purpose, but I know that it happens. I try very hard to be very loving, very thoughtful, and all that, but I also know that sometimes I am outspoken. As a police officer we come across kind of blunt at times and after all the years I spent in that field I know that it happens. But if someone really knows me, they know my love for people and that I just would not ever do anything to hurt someone on purpose. Sometimes I think some people just like being a victim too. Know what I mean? You just stay true to yourself.

Brenda S Okie in Colorado said...

Memaw!!! Where are you my dear? I miss you. I pray you are well and just need a short break from us.

The Park Wife said...

Memaw, Been a while, great to have time now to come by for a visit. My feelings get hurt easily, I have tried to be better about it, I don't want my kids to be like that. I think I have the best of intentions but sometimes the other person is at a place not able to accept it, that is why they get offended.
Arkansas wether is great today, loving it!!!!
The Park Wife

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